Earlier this week I mentioned a verse I have found in Proverbs, chapter 18, verse 22 to be exact; this is the verse I’d like to look at today. "22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD." Now you may read this, and wonder where all the vanity and the grasping of the wind is at. Well, its not here today. Instead of taking time to continue our exploration through Ecclesiastes, I chose this morning to take a moment to talk about marriage, on my ten year anniversary.
First let me say, that in my wife, I have found a good thing, I have found favor in the Lord. Jen is truly an amazing person. She is smart, and beautiful, she works a full time job, Raises my children, keeps the household up and running, and still finds time to be a part of my ministry both here and in the church. For those of you who have been enjoying our thoughts here, you have in part my wife to thank. She bought the site, found the tool, connected them, and wrote code. If all that had been up to me, we’d be printing our thought on to fliers and handing them out in front of the 7-11, because I have no idea how this all works.
Now for those of you who know my wife or have even seen our pictures, you may be thinking we don’t look old enough to have been married ten years. (Or at least I hope you are) Well, we were married young by American Standards or at least Christian standards. And yes sometimes things were rough early, yet I wouldn’t change a thing; even if I could. So often times people want to wait, until there in a better situation, wait until they have the perfect job, wait until they can afford it. I’m not saying it’s wrong to wait; I am saying it’s not always right to wait. Remember He who finds a wife, finds a good thing.
So what’s my secret you ask? In today’s day and age many marriages don’t last ten years. Especially those among to head strong firstborns like my wife and I. Well there’s great news out there, there is no secret. The key’s to a solid marriage are found right in the Word of God, and free for the taking.
It kills me that the divorce rate among Christians is the same as non-Christians, as a matter of face, a recent study by the Barna Research Group, shows that divorce rates among Christians is higher then those outside the church. How can that me. My wife and I are together today, because we have both made a decision to be. We’ve read the Word of God, seen his displeasure in divorce and both mad a decision that divorce was never an option, and will never be an option. We both wake up daily and make the decision to love each other. Sure love is a feeling, but it’s also an act of will. And when you make it about more then feelings I believe it will last. Are there days my wife doesn’t like me, sure. Are there days I’m not as happy with her, sure. But that doesn’t matter, because through all of that we both know we still love each other. And even beyond that, we both know were with each other for life. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
It’s also important to remember the flip side of that statement. If love in a controlled act of will. Then I can make the decision not to fall in love with another woman. You see love is not uncontrollable, love is not overwhelming, and love is not random. All of these are lies that have been pushed upon you my Hollywood, by the media, by the humanist movement. What is love you ask? Love is an act of will, love is accompanied by emotion (but it’s not only emotion) and love leads to an action on its behalf. What action you ask. Well Christian, I’ll tell you. As much it’s become taboo lets look to Ephesians 5:22-25, 28, and 33:
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,
28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.
33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Although I don’t have time to go into great detail this morning, let me just say this, husbands, the action of love calls you to treat your wife right, to sacrifice of yourself for her, whether or not she deserves it. And wives, the action of love calls for you to respect your husband. Respect his God given position in the family. Even if he doesn’t deserve that respect; respect him.
Let me say this in closing, if all Christians followed these commands in Ephesians, we would not see a divorce rate higher then the world. We may not see one at all.
And on a personal note, Jen… Happy Anniversary
